The other day, I was pondering what my life would be like if I had said "no" to God...not in the overall sense, but in the "no" to serving Him overseas sense...(as written in my journal).
Would I be married and have children?
Would I enjoy my job?
What would I be doing?
What would my ideas of church be?
Would I be happy?
Would I know another language? Or have a desire to meet people from other nations?
What would my vacations look like?
Would I be content?
Would I live close to my family?
Would I realize how precious life is, and how short, and spend time with my grandparents?
Would I ever consider taking public transport instead of needing my own car?
Would I know how to live simply?
Even though it's not always easy, and some days I just long for home, I can't imagine my life any other way. I was created for this...like an actor was created to act or a teacher created to teach or an artist created to create.
No, I'm not saying I wouldn't or couldn't be happy living life in the States. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it...except that it's not where I was called to live. As much as I miss it and as much as I long for it, I wouldn't trade this life.
Yes, it can be lonely.
Yes, I am missing out on major life events.
Yes, I miss the intimate relationships I had.
Yes, I miss my family and friends.
Yes, I miss English and American products (what American living overseas doesn't miss peanut butter?!).
But, if I lived there, I'd miss out on so many things here. I'd miss the chance to rely on God and allow Him to uphold me and provide for me and cry with me when I'm lonely. I wouldn't realize the importance of being intentional with my grandparents. I wouldn't talk as often or as deeply with my family. I wouldn't be pushed outside my comfort zone and forced to grow. I wouldn't know another language, culture or people. I wouldn't know what it means to live simply.
I am richer for this experience. It has changed me and I'll never be the same again. Thank you, Lord, that even when it's hard and I want to give up, I still know where I'm supposed to be...and I know you haven't left me.
Would I be married and have children?
Would I enjoy my job?
What would I be doing?
What would my ideas of church be?
Would I be happy?
Would I know another language? Or have a desire to meet people from other nations?
What would my vacations look like?
Would I be content?
Would I live close to my family?
Would I realize how precious life is, and how short, and spend time with my grandparents?
Would I ever consider taking public transport instead of needing my own car?
Would I know how to live simply?
Even though it's not always easy, and some days I just long for home, I can't imagine my life any other way. I was created for this...like an actor was created to act or a teacher created to teach or an artist created to create.
No, I'm not saying I wouldn't or couldn't be happy living life in the States. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it...except that it's not where I was called to live. As much as I miss it and as much as I long for it, I wouldn't trade this life.
Yes, it can be lonely.
Yes, I am missing out on major life events.
Yes, I miss the intimate relationships I had.
Yes, I miss my family and friends.
Yes, I miss English and American products (what American living overseas doesn't miss peanut butter?!).
But, if I lived there, I'd miss out on so many things here. I'd miss the chance to rely on God and allow Him to uphold me and provide for me and cry with me when I'm lonely. I wouldn't realize the importance of being intentional with my grandparents. I wouldn't talk as often or as deeply with my family. I wouldn't be pushed outside my comfort zone and forced to grow. I wouldn't know another language, culture or people. I wouldn't know what it means to live simply.
I am richer for this experience. It has changed me and I'll never be the same again. Thank you, Lord, that even when it's hard and I want to give up, I still know where I'm supposed to be...and I know you haven't left me.
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